A Tense Debate

Tom & Peter dye eggs

People don’t usually prepare statements for English club, but last Saturday was different. We had warned everyone what we were going to be talking about it and since we have some newer members with less English, we recommended they prepare.

All the women that night read prepared statements. They were all very similar, something like this:
“I don’t like polygamy. It is bad for the country. Polygamy causes problems and conflicts.  I want my husband to only have one wife. You can not split your love equally.”

Some even declared that polygamy leads to deaths! (The later explanation was that rival wives put curses on each other or their husband.)

Team celebrates Seder

These 4 unmarried women sat in a room full of island men. Unfortunately none of our women friends with advanced English were able to come that night so after the 4 prepared statements-- the men took the floor for most of the debate.

Here are some sound bytes:
“I am sad to hear the women say this, because our religion says that polygamy is good, so if they are good women then they should never say such things.”

“My father was a polygamist and I want to be a polygamist someday.” (young single man)

“I am a polygamist right now!”

Grace with her dyed egg

“My friend took another wife and I asked him why. His wife’s cycles were very long and it was too hard on him so he took another wife.”

“Really our book says that you must treat the wives equally, so if you can’t treat them equally, you shouldn’t take another wife.”

“If a polygamist comes for my sister and she is getting older, I will tell her to accept him. I don’t want her to be public property all her life.”

“Women, what would you prefer? Would you rather your husband went around and took lots of mistresses or that he should just take another wife?” (stated like these are the only two options.)

We asked questions, we clarified our position, we challenged ideas, but we also just let the islanders discuss together. This is a topic that divides the sexes here. Women are fairly empowered in this culture and so we often see the underlying culture and the state religion coming into conflict. 

At the same time, it is hard for us to hear.  It breaks our hearts and reminds us how differently we view the world.  All the men except one supported polygamy.  They seemed unphased, unfeeling, and completely oblivious to the fact that every single woman in the group detested it. 

But there was one man. His English is not so good, but he said, “I hate it.  It causes too much problems.”  One man out of 12.  Maybe it’s a start… 

Refugee camp

PRAYERS ANSWERED
We are excited about the opportunities that English club has given us to challenge islanders and have good conversations. Tom got to go and see the refugee camp (residents of village split in two by recent fissure), he was encouraged by how it was being run. The team celebrated a Seder meal, helping add a layer of significance to this holy week. Our team continues to learn and be challenged about prayer and fasting.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
Tonight (Saturday) at English club we will be discussing this special holiday weekend and its significance to us. We pray that it would be another good discussion and that the right people would be there tonight. Pray for our whole team that we would have opportunities to share about this special holiday this weekend. Grace has lice (some friends of hers had them so we knew it was a danger)-- pray that we can get rid of them quickly without anyone else getting them.