Debrief

First day of debrief- fun day at the spring

It really is over.  For the last two and a half years we have lived in close proximity with one another.    Worked together; struggled together; played together and suffered together. We’ve been through a lot.  We’ve had some great highs and some hard lows.  As a team we’ve learned to speak another language without a classroom or text books.  We’ve made friends that may last a lifetime.  We’ve lived in a different part of the world among a people, culture, and faith quite different from our own.  We’ve shared our hearts, our time, our money, our very lives with those around us.  And now, after two and a half years, it has all come to an end.  How do you end well?  How do you say goodbye?

Spring, plus rope swing

I’m glad that the program we’ve been a part of has thought about the necessity of ending well.  And really there are two parts to the ending.  There is saying goodbye to the islands and its people and then saying goodbye to the team.  The team did well saying goodbye on the islands.  Many people were sad to see them go, but the appreciation and love were quite evident, even as many came to the airport to see them off.  And so that part had come to an end.

For our team, we gathered at the program retreat center in a beautiful and relaxing part of Tanzania.  Here for 4 days we played together, reflected together, and with the help of the program leadership, brought our team to a close.

How would you organize a time like this?  I appreciate the way they went about it.  The days were organized very simply.  The first day we had a fun outing as a team—to a natural spring—a sort of oasis in the Tanzanian savannah.  The next three days involved some guided reflection with the team, but it was only in the morning and left much time for relaxing.  The first day was confession.  Very simply, we apologized to one another for all the ways, big and small, we had hurt one another over the years.  The second day was reflection.  We thought about the program and what went well and what didn’t.  If it were up to us, what would we change and what would we keep.  The third day was given over to appreciation.  Each person was appreciated and prayed for.  That night we had a ceremony.  A nice meal and a celebration of completing the program.

As we said goodbye to one another for the last time, giving hugs and promising to keep in touch it felt like we didn’t have to say much.  The important things had been said.  It was sad, but it was good.  Everything has it’s season, and this season had come to its end.  God bless you, teammates.

Yeah, Ma Imani gave birth to a healthy baby!

PRAYERS ANSWERED
We’ve heard from most of our teammates that they have arrived safely to their various destinations. We were able to get our youngest evaluated and the clinic was very accommodating to our tight schedule and our son was in a good mood that day. We made it safely back to the islands. Ma Imani had her baby— a healthy baby girl! The delivery was induced early but now both mother and baby are back home and recovering well.

PRAYERS
It was confirmed that our youngest is not hearing well, but we were relieved to learn that most likely the cause is reversible, though it may mean minor surgery— pray for us as we seek out a second opinion and look into our options for getting him the treatment he needs as soon as possible. The island elections (which happened three weeks ago) have not been officially settled. The initial results have been challenged with two sides claiming victory— today the official results are supposed to be announced. Pray for peace and a healthy transition of government on the islands. Another foreign worker on the island has had to leave suddenly for a medical emergency— it is possible that she is seriously  ill. Pray for her and her husband, as well as those trying to carry on with the work here.

An Epic Ceremony

Tom up front and giving his speech

It was the final thing. Half of the team was leaving the very next morning. One final ceremony to give out certificates to our English students. But this was special for several reasons:

• This English center had decided to only give certificates once a year. So there was a year of students to celebrate— around 150 students.
• This was not just about certificates, this was also a goodbye to our team.
• The head of this center never likes to do things small— so it was in one of the nicest venues, there was drama, music and dance planned.
• Every single student was told to prepare a speech in English— that’s around 150 speeches.

So we got dressed in our best and headed to the venue around 4pm. Megan and the kids left around 7pm in the middle of all the student speeches. Tom wasn’t home until well after 8pm. Now it is hard to recreate this 4+ hr experience for you. First imagine a packed auditorium with a brightly lit stage. You are dressed in several layers and it is hot- every few minutes you wipe sweat away or attempt to fan yourself.

Our youngest poses on stage during the lip-syncing

Here are the highlights:

• Prayers to begin and end the ceremony with some recitation from their holy book thrown in.
• a speech in English by the mother of the school director (she’s also the head sponsor-- "when did this old island grandma learn any English?!")
• a long several-scene skit about the value of learning English (i.e. so you won’t be cheated in business deals with English speakers)
• singing the island national anthem and then the American “national anthem” (?)- “God bless America” - which all the islanders had practiced and belted out
• Tom giving a rousing speech in the island language
• a spunky 15 yr old student lip-syncing to an American pop song
• a scandalous dance performance by young teenage couples followed by some brake-dancing
• lots of speeches— including several people who got up and forgot what they were going to say, so the crowd would yell “Say, Thank You!” Many obediently said “thank you” and went to stand with the certificate holders
• flower necklaces for all the teachers and many of the students, often placed over the head mid-speech.
• a dramatic finish- the lights are dimmed, candles are brought out and everyone sings along with Michael Jackson’s “Heal the World”
• an extended photo session with about a million cameras and every permutation of students plus teachers imaginable.
  

  

  Another of the student speeches, they kept going & going...

Sound like fun?  Do you want to go?  It was certainly an unforgettable experience.

PRAYERS ANSWERED
We made it safely to our debrief location and we made it through our team debrief (which we’ll probably write about next week). It was a really nice time of reflecting, affirming and bringing about closure for our team.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
We have begun to say goodbye to our teammates. Everyone will be traveling this coming week, pray for safe travels and smooth transitions. By mid-week we will be back on Clove Island without our team. Pray for us and our kids as we transition into this new stage. We will be passing through a big city on the way to the islands and have the opportunity to have our youngest’s hearing and speech evaluated— some of the evaluations require “child compliance” so please pray with us that he will be a in good and cooperative mood so the evaluations will go well (the appointments are on Monday morning- Africa time). Please pray for good health— there have been some bugs going around and it is never to be sick or have sick kids as you travel. The election results are still being contested— pray that the final results could be settled soon and peacefully.

Election Tension

Tom & friends dressed for a celebration

Election time on the islands is a tense time. This small country has seen so much corruption, so many coups, that many islanders don’t truly expect elections to be fair and free. Even the presence of international monitors doesn’t seem to allay people’s fears that cheating will take place. We’ve heard stories of fake ballots, people voting in multiple locations, voters paid at the polls, dead people voting and reigning governments “stealing” the election from any opposing candidates.

But then election day itself is quiet. The constant din of campaigning is forbidden. No one is allowed to travel between villages. There are no cars on the road. It is calm. The eye of the storm.

Once the polls close, the noise returns. Rumors abound. Unofficial results are shared and shouted. Some premature victory laps are taken by the supposed winners. In a clear cut election, this would be election day night or the next day and it would be over.

But this past weekend’s election was not as clear cut. We’ve heard from credible sources that the election for our island’s governor came down to 200 votes or less. The rumors went both ways. One said the incumbent won, others said that the opposition candidate won but that the incumbent was trying to steal the election. The gathering place right outside our house seemed to be constantly full of groups of people talking excitedly. Our neighborhood is split between the two candidates.

Next there were stories of groups gathering and blocking traffic…of a woman being roughed up after she was caught hiding false ballots under her traditional island wrap and entering a polling place. Sometimes we’d see the groups in front of our house suddenly start yelling and running— sometimes fleeing the approach of a military police vehicle or running toward some excitement down the street. The kids’ school was cancelled. On the last morning of school we were rushed into someone’s house on the walk home (less than a block from our house) because a crowd was rushing toward us and I was told it wasn’t safe to be on the road with the children. One neighbor told us that maybe we should just stay in our house for the next three days. Another grandmother said she had just been crying and crying— remembering the coups and violence of bygone years.

From our roof, military police & crowd

But for all this dramatic talk— nothing much seemed to actually be happening. For a while the excitement was centered right at the end of our block. People had dragged rocks and an old gutted car to block the road leading to one of the polling places. (Our neighbors gave contradicting accounts for why they were blocking the road.) We watched from our roof while they tried to light the car on fire, but then an island grandmother came out and yelled at them and they quickly put out all the flames with the air of scolded children. Apparently a group slept out on the street to make sure the road stayed blocked. But then the next morning a truck of armed military police came, took all the stuff off the road and themselves blocked the road, with a crowd of people tensely watching them. Later that day, there were no military police, no crowd, nothing blocking the road— life on the street was back to normal without any actual confrontation.

Yesterday (5 days after election day) the word came from the capital. Opposition candidates had won— both for president of the entire country and in our island’s governor race. We happened to be in the capital during the announcement and for hours we heard the shouts of victory and the honking cars.

The tension is over (hopefully). The results are in and fears that the standing government would “steal” the election rather than lose power have been proven wrong. Our islands have new leaders and now we pray that they will be good ones.

5 of our team kids

PRAYERS ANSWERED
We are thankful that in spite of all the tension during the week, it appears that there was no significant violence. Our teammates packed up their homes and said their goodbyes. We have made it safely off the islands and are currently en route to our team’s final debrief (which will be taking place in mainland Africa). We were able to change one of our flights to allow us to make an appointment for our youngest son.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
Please pray for our final week with our team. We have days of travel together before beginning our official debrief together on Wednesday. Pray for a good time of reflection and closure of this 2.5 years together. We’ve focused on finishing well on the islands, now we want to finish well as a team. Pray especially for the 7 team children who don’t always understand all the travel and transitions that are coming their way in the coming days.

Goodbye Celebrations

On the noisy bus for the goodbye tour!

First of all, we (Megan and Tom) are not saying goodbyes yet.  We will not be leaving Clove Island until July.  But this week marks the final week for our team and for our teammates.  They are saying goodbyes. 

Saying goodbye is important in island culture.  They even have a verb for it: hu-laga.  Loosely translated it means, to go out and especially inform someone that you are leaving.  You can use it like my neighbor does whenever I take a trip of even a day and forget to mention it to her, “I’m mad at you.” She says with a smile, “You didn’t laga me.”  I make my sincere apologies, and everything is fine.  But it highlights the fact that saying goodbye is important to islanders, and so with all our team leaving, islanders want to say goodbye properly.  This past weekend it meant a big celebration: a tour of the island and an all-day picnic.  Now that’s saying goodbye.

Tour Stop: Collect water from spring

So it worked out that half the group would go to the picnic site and spend the day there, talking, eating, dancing and cooking.  The other half of the group would drive around the entire island, ending at the picnic spot.  Doing the island tour is no easy thing thanks to the state of the roads, so it was easy to divide up.  Megan and the kids would go to the picnic spot and I would go on the tour.

Now I’ve done the tour before, but it was interesting to do it with a bus load of island students.  I was definitely on the noisy bus.  They sang and laughed and chanted for the entire 7 hours of the tour.  In short, they had a great time.  Now when I’ve done the tour before with foreign visitors, we make frequent stops on the way—to view a waterfall, to get some pictures of a scenic vista, or a pristine beach.  But I’ve never done the tour with islanders before.  It was interesting to see the things they stopped for.

Tour Stop: Only Tunnel on the Island

Our first stop was to see a miracle of nature.  A coconut palm that split halfway up and had two tops, looking like the letter Y.  Apparently, this is the only one of it’s kind on the whole island and worth taking a picture of.  Other stops included getting water from a fresh spring.  Buying raw milk in a region that is famous for it.  Visiting the tomb of an ancient relative.  Walking through the only man-made tunnel on the island.  Visiting a hydroelectric power station in disrepair, and finally stopping at a nice beach for a snack (where no one went swimming).  In the afternoon we arrived at the picnic spot where I rejoined my family. 

It was a long, hard and relatively fun day that I wouldn’t have missed for anything.  Something we’ve learned from living here is the importance of showing up.  It means a great deal to islanders.  Relationships are so important and showing up is of first importance.  We are reminded of this in a thousand different ways.  People who apologize to us because they haven’t visited us in a while.  Someone thanking us profusely for coming to their class or to their wedding, etc. even when we don’t know them very well.  Getting in trouble for not saying hello to someone often enough or not stopping regularly by their shop.  People frequently stopping by our house for no other purpose except to stop by.  People asking where we were when we do miss an event.  This “showing up” is required of relationship here, and so we do it.  Sometimes it’s uncomfortable and tiresome, but we show up.  And maybe we have something to learn from our island friends in this: A friend shows up.

The picnic ended with speeches.  One of the organizers stood up and made a very nice speech.  It was pretty exciting to hear what he said about our group.  In his own words he said, “They have left a good life in their home countries.  They have left their families and friends and they have come here.  They are here because [the One they follow] was a servant and so they also serve.”  Sometimes we wonder if islanders understand our love for them.  This weekend was a nice reminder that for many the answer is “Yes.”

Tour Stop: Beach bungalow for snack time!

PRAYERS ANSWERED
We made it through the craziness of last weekend. We’re especially thankful that our kids did so well being dragged around to different events— our youngest was sick for the big all-day picnic but as still a trooper. We welcomed two islanders into the family this week! A group of us went to the shore to see both a man and a woman go for a special swim. A wonderful goodbye celebration!

PRAYERS REQUESTED
The final round of presidential elections are tomorrow on the islands— pray for a peaceful process and good leadership for this people. The final week for our team will include a lot of packing, final celebrations, giving things away, and saying goodbyes— pray for them in this transition. Pray for all of us as we travel to mainland Africa where we will be led through a final debrief of our time as a team. We are also hoping to change our flight back to the islands so we can get our youngest’s hearing and speech evaluated there— pray that the logistics will all be worked out smoothly.

Holiday Messages

Tom sending his over 150 texts

It’s become something of a tradition for me.  A few years ago I noticed that on the big holidays I would receive text messages and phone calls from island friends and even distant acquaintances.  It seemed a bit weird at the time, but then I came to realize that this was classic island networking.  On the islands, as in most of Africa, keeping up connections with a large circle of people is seen as good, necessary, and important.  I won’t go into all the reasons for this, but suffice it to say that staying connected is a highly valued skill in this culture.  Now I’m not terribly good at keeping connected.  It doesn’t come naturally to us.  But I realized, this text messaging thing at holidays—I can do that.  It doesn’t cost me much.  All I have to do is write up a short message, send it out to everyone on my contact list and voila! I’ve strengthened my connections.

So I did it for one of the holidays.  Then I got the idea: I can do this for every major holiday!  I can remind them of holidays that I celebrate of which they are ignorant.  I can even use a text message to spread love and truth in a short and simple way.

Now, you’re probably already saying, “Well, isn’t that nice.  Kind of like an email forward holiday greeting over the phone.”  But let me give you some examples of how I know that it means a lot to people here.

- As soon as I send out the message I already get at least twenty text responses in return filled with thanks and blessing (the ones from my English students are always especially enjoyable, “Think you Techer! You miss me so much.  God you give blessings and your family!”)
- Those who have the money or really desire the relationship, call me back.  They want to wish me a happy holiday over the phone voice to voice.  I will usually get phone calls for the next three or four days.
- In the following days, as I run into friends and acquaintances they thank me profusely for the message and ask my apologies for not sending a message in return.
- In the following days people I haven’t seen in weeks or sometimes months stop by the house to thank me for the message.
All this from a little forwarded message that says nothing more than a few words.  These few words, however, can also lead to some good conversations…
As many of you know, we recently celebrated a big holiday.  So, as is my custom, I sent out a message.  In the message I tried to remind people in just a few words  what the holiday was all about.  This led to three deeper conversations (so far). 

Birthday Time!

 The first was with my landlord.  His wife came up and said, “I got your message.  Who died?”  (When I explained to her who had died, she acted like she didn’t understand, like she had never heard of him, but I know she understood perfectly well.)  But then I got into a conversation with her husband.  He wanted to tell me how things “really happened” but instead I got to share with him in a meaningful and powerful way the deeper reasons for the holiday.

Later that week, taking out the garbage I ran into a neighbor who got the message.  He ended up sharing with me a sad episode in his life about his first wife who was of a different faith and taught him about the different holidays, but who left him many years ago.  I had never heard this story, and the conversation didn’t have a chance to go anywhere else, but for certain we just went a little deeper.

The last conversation was with a man I hadn’t seen in months.  A mere acquaintance from English teaching.  He came by the house, and over lunch (he happened to arrive at lunch time) we were able to discuss some truths about life that I don’t think could have happened if not for that message.

So a text message…it’s a little thing…but then again we have a Father who loves to use little things.

PRAYERS ANSWERED
Thank you for praying about our big English teaching picnic.  The different administrators have come to a compromise which everyone is okay with and no one seems offended.  We are very thankful and hopeful that they will continue to work together, especially after we leave, and that a picnic would not be a source of strife.  Thanks also for praying for those with sickness.  Our little teammate is doing much better and the teammate with tummy troubles seems to be getting over it now too. Our eldest son turned 6 years old this week— we celebrated with a new hike up a river. It was a lot of fun and we are very thankful for all the ways our son is growing and learning.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
One of our teammate’s moms just went for heart surgery yesterday.  Pray for her safe recovery and for our teammates as they struggle with being so far away during a difficult season like this.
Our time is drawing to an end, and in classic island fashion, people are realizing this at the last minute and organizing all sorts of picnics and celebrations.  This makes are last days fun but stressful.  Pray especially for this weekend as it seems like we’ll be going non-stop!  Pray for our final days, that we can end well with unity, love and purpose!  Presidential elections (for the islands) are next week.  Pray for a good leader to be chosen and for the end of campaigning and elections to be calm and without incident.