Honoring

Tom with Sterehi and kids

As a team, we read and discuss things. We’ve been reading a book together that challenges us to see life from a different worldview. Traditionally the west has been dominated by ideas of right and wrong (this isn’t exclusively true anymore, but it is our heritage). While great chunks of the world have been dominated by the ideas of honor and shame. The ideas of seeking/giving honor and avoiding shame are guiding principles for many cultures.

An example from the book:
A father has two sons. He asked them to do some work. One son refuses to his father’s face. Another says he will do it but has no plan to do it.

From our perspective we might say, “Well at least the first one told the truth. The other lied!” But from an honor/shame culture, the second son is a good son. He didn’t want to do the work, but he didn’t shame his father by saying he wouldn’t. The first son is a bad son because he dishonoured his father by refusing his request to his face.

Here’s a recent example from the islands:
The minister of transportation wanted to go to the next island. She had a ticket for the following day, but wasn’t sure, she might want to fly the day before. Last minute she decided she wanted to fly the day earlier. She arrived at the airport an hour late for the flight (for which she didn’t have a ticket). The flight had already left. In her anger, she grounded the entire airline. She wouldn’t let them run any of their flights for the rest of the day throughout the country.

Our western reaction was to be horrified by this abuse of power. We think of all the people that were inconvenienced and how transportation was driven to a standstill because of her selfish reaction. But on the internet our teammate saw some reactions from islanders. Many islanders were horrified that the airline didn’t show appropriate honor for this high-ranking official. In their minds the flight should have been held for her and the minister’s reaction was a deserved response for the airline having brought shame upon her.

This reality has lots of repercussions. We are discussing and thinking about them as a team. But one quick takeaway is that we want to do more to honor people. This is one prevalent way people show love here. Are we appropriately honoring our friends?

Women and kids

Tom has been good friends with Sterehi for a long-time but usually it is just the two of them hanging out and doing things. So we invited Sterehi to come with his wife and his three kids for a meal. We tried to think about what would honor them and put them at ease? We took our cue from how islanders receive guests. We dressed nicely. We had everything prepared for them. We had some cold sodas at the ready to serve them when they arrived. We complimented them and praised their children. We were generous with the food and reluctant to let them leave.  In short,we did the best we knew how to honor our friends.  We hope they appreciated it.  We certainly had a nice time with them.

The next time Tom saw Sterehi he had a big smile on his face, and thanked him again for the dinner.  Showing our friends special honor—for us it feels like a small thing, parts of it feeling unimportant or unnecessary—especially for a real friend.  But here perhaps these small things are more important than we realize.

PRAYERS ANSWERED
The dinner with Sterehi’s family went well. Megan was able to connect with his wife and we are hopeful that this could be the beginning to reaching out more to his whole family (not just him). A few of you were aware that last night an island sister took an illegal boat to the French island the night before last. She is 8.5 months with twins and took 2 other children on this dangerous trip. We were not excited to hear that she decided to make this trip, but we are very thankful to hear that she has arrived there safely.


PRAYERS REQUESTED
Pray for us as we try to understand the ideas of honor and shame in this culture so we can connect better with islanders and explain truth to them better too. We’ve begun our 12 days of concentrated prayer on the island. The team coming to pray with us arrives on our island tomorrow. Pray for safe final travels and for a smooth transition to the time zone and climate of the islands for them. It’s not too late if you want to participate and pray along with us, just send us an email and we’ll send you a guide. A member of Tom’s family has been diagnosed with MS- pray for her and her family as they deal with the new realities this diagnosis represents. An old family friend of Megan’s family has recently died of cancer- we rejoice in her life and legacy. Pray for her family as they grieve.

Last minute update: Three members of the short-term team have been side-lined in Nairobi (one of them came down sick and wasn't allowed to board the final plane). Pray for the logistics of getting them to Clove Island with the rearranging of flights and accomodations that has to happen.

A Funeral

The town of the funeral

It was about nine o’clock on Friday.  We got a phone call that a friend, a brother from Volcano Island, had died.  He was actually from Clove Island and his body was being flown over that morning for burial.  The man that died was young—probably in his 40’s.  We didn’t know him well, but he had been a friend of many in our group.  It would be good to show our respects.  The town where he was to be buried was far, but I don’t work on Fridays—it’s our day off, so I was available to go.  Within an hour of getting the news I was on my way to the funeral.

It’s not easy finding buses to far off villages.  It took me over half an hour to flag one down.  Then it was an hour and a half bus ride squished in an over packed bus bumping and swerving over roads in terrible need of repair.  One man claimed that the ride would only take 20 minutes if the road was fixed.  I’m inclined to believe him. 

When I arrived in the town I called a friend.  He is from that same town and could guide me to the right place. But he was not going to the funeral, so he dropped me at the door and I was invited in.  They immediately ushered me into the room with the deceased.  He was laid out on a bed and covered from head to toe by a green prayer cloth ornately decorated in gold with verses in Arabic and holy sites.  The outline of the body was only partly visible.  I would never see his face.  That is not the custom.  While I was there others came and a prayer was offered.  I stood in the back and offered my own prayers.  Then I left and took a seat on the porch and watched others repeat the same ritual.   I had arrived at about 11:30.  Since it was Friday, most people went to pray, and the funeral would be held following the mid-day prayer.  So I sat.  I waited for someone to address me, but whether because I was unknown to them, or because it was a funeral, we simply sat in silence.  The women, who don’t usually go to the prayers, were in a room nearby singing.  They sang song after song.  This is how they mourned him.

Returning from prayers, the porch became crowded and then they said their prayers for the dead man.  It began with recitation, spoken very quickly and in Arabic.  This went on for quite a while.  Many mumbled along.  Others took pride in knowing it well and spoke out loudly.  Still others looked quiet and bored.  I sat silently.  This was followed by chanting the phrase “there is no god but God.”  Over and over again at an accelerating rate.  A few more prayers were said and then they readied the body to go to the cemetery.

Our family on an earlier visit to the funeral town

The body was placed in a temporary coffin, and draped with another ornate prayer cloth.  It was then carried to the gravesite.  Everyone followed along.  Men took turns holding the coffin on their shoulder.  A constant rotation kept anyone from carrying the coffin for long.  Others, like myself, simply walked behind the coffin with the crowd of men.  We walked through the town until we arrived at the grave site.  Some went into the cemetery but most waited respectfully outside.  This was also a chance to socialise a bit.  Until this moment I hadn’t seen anyone I knew.  Now a few men from the capital and one of my students from the town were there.  We exchanged some greetings.  One of the men, a neighbour of mine, agreed to give me a ride home with him and his friends. 

My neighbour asked how I came to be here.  I told him I knew that known A_____.  “Who??” he asked.  “The man who died,” I explained.  My neighbor didn’t know him.  He was just a friend of the family.  “I knew him.”  I said.  “He was friends with many people in our group.  He fixed my refrigerator once.”  I also prayed with him on a few occasions, I thought.  “Yes, I’m told he was a very good technician.” My neighbor said.

After the body had been buried and final speeches and prayers given, we left.
The car ride home was long.  The driver wanting to protect his car took each bump at an agonisingly slow pace.  I asked my neighbour a question that had been nagging me.  How did he die?  “His wife ran off with the kids.  They left him.  He was so sad that he stopped eating and drinking.  He got sick and then he just died.  A heart attack or something.”  I hadn’t seen this man in a long time, probably years.  This news was sad to hear, but I wondered if my neighbor’s story was even true.  I may never know.

PRAYERS ANSWERED
Our sick teammate seems to be recovering well—although there are still a few tummy issues.  Pray for full recovery soon.  The boils on the children seem to be going away.  Pray for no more recurrences and that it would be completely gone.  We are thankful for our team and the good discussions and good unity we’ve had lately.  It feels like all of us are growing together.  Pray that it could continue.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
Pray for light shining in dark places.  Pray for the darkness to flee.  Pray for chains to be broken and those in prison to be freed.  Pray for life to spring forth out of death.  Pray for hope.  A team is coming out to pray with us soon.  Pray for all their preparations. You can be praying with us from home too. Would you like to join in the prayer fun? We’ll send you a prayer guide.  Email us.

Fighting Cynicism

It can be a beautiful place here

Sometimes we look around the islands and all we see is potential. There is so much beauty here, no doubt someday the infrastructure will be developed enough that tourists will be able to come and see this hidden treasure. There is so much interest, no doubt the truth will penetrate more and more hearts, and we will see real change even on a societal level.

But in the meantime, we have many disappointments. Corruption runs rampant in the government so that the broke electric company is unable to provide electricity (power cuts become more and more rampant, we had a 36+hr stretch recently without power). Government officials stealing money is so expected that no one even blinks an eye, while the public school teachers have gone months without pay. (They have been striking for several weeks and are on the brink of having a “white year”- meaning no end-of-the-year exams, so no one can advance to the next grade.) The justice system is so corrupt that people can’t find true justice so they take matters into their own hands, causing even our friends and neighbours to support mob violence (read last week’s blog). People cling to power and wield it selfishly. The standing government held parliamentary elections before all the representatives could arrive so that their party (which is not majority) could win all the leadership positions. Then the minister of transportation grounded the only well-functioning airline in the country because one of their flights left without her (she was over an hour late for the flight and she didn’t even have a ticket for it). Then there are the deteriorating roads, the erosion and  the ubiquitous trash that mars the landscape. (Tom was playing a guessing game with Peter. “It’s something on the ocean.” “A whale!” “No, something that floats on top of the water.” Peter thinks a second, “Garbage?”)

We aren’t surprised anymore when we hear some new horrible tale of governmental stealing or abuse of power. We don’t bat an eye as we see riverbeds full of trash. We never assume the power will be on.

We don’t want to get our hopes up that things will change any time soon. We expect the worst so as to avoid disappointment. But the danger is that we will become cynical, that we will start to doubt that things can change.

Our kids help keep us hopeful

THEY CAN CHANGE! And sometimes change (even big change) has to start small. As small as a mustard seed. Maybe it is in islanders catching glimpses of another way. Maybe it starts with a challenging discussion topic at our English club. Maybe it starts with one heart being transformed by truth.

There are so many things here that we would love to see change, but as we pray for change- let us not be discouraged. Because there is so much potential and small changes are happening. Let’s pray for extra momentum. I know Someone who can give these islanders a push in the right direction.

PRAYERS ANSWERED
Our holiday English club last week went well. We were bold in talking about the differences in our beliefs. It went well. There was genuine interest in understanding our viewpoint. One person called Tom aside as he left and expressed interest in talking about things more.Our two teammates have had good meetings with the minister of agriculture- opening the way to develop our group’s presence/impact among farmers.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
One of our teammates is very sick. Please pray for her quick recovery. A bunch of kids on our team are suffering with boils (contagious bacterial infections). Pray that they would heal soon without any new infections. Many of our teammates are thinking about future steps. Our team still has a year to go, but pray for them even now as they begin to pray about what God will have for them next. We pray that some will return to continue the work here, but we know some will be called elsewhere.

Mob Violence

Women gathered on our road for an event

We mentioned in our requests last week that a horrible thing happened here.  A murder.  Such things are very rare on the islands.  People live in such close proximity to one another and everyone knows everyone—everyone is practically related to everyone—that murder is virtually unheard of.  It’s a serious crime, unthinkable for almost all islanders.

In brief, (warning—this is a bit graphic)  two men got into an altercation and one was badly beaten by the other.  He was taken to the hospital for stitches.  The injured man went back that night; found the other man; came up behind him with a broken bottle and slit his throat.  The man died in moments.  The murderer went off into the night.

But the story does not end there.  As one family mourned, the community rose up.  A mob went in search of the murderer.  When they found him, they beat him and eventually killed him.  The next morning there was a double funeral for both of the men.

Mob violence is something found all over the world.  (Not even the States are immune to it.)  So we decided to ask our English Club what they thought of the incident.

First of all, one of our club members was a cousin of the first man killed (like we said—everybody is related to everybody) so the subject was very real and very close for many of our club members.  But we asked them if they agreed with what happened. Was it right for the community to kill the man? Should they have called the police instead? They overwhelmingly agreed that it was right for the mob to kill the murderer.  “Why?” we asked.  “Why not let the police handle it and let justice be done?”

“There is no justice from the police here.”  They replied.  “Only the poor are punished.”  “Anyone with money or with a family member with money will be released.”  “That’s the way things work here.”  “You cannot depend on the justice system.”  “The only way to find justice is from the mob.”

Interestingly, they acknowledged that the rule of law would be better, but where the law doesn’t function the only alternative is mob violence.  “Plus,” they said, “since it was the mob that handled it, it keeps the family of the murdered man from seeking revenge.”  The family wasn’t directly involved—it was the mob.  The mob dealt out justice. Case closed.

Case closed?

Our 5 year old!

We are reminded this week of another mob.  They sought the life of an innocent man.  The justice system feared the angry mob and gave into its demands.  “Crucify him,” they said.  And the State agreed.  The justice system failed.  The mob failed.  Justice was not done.  And yet, by this great injustice, many would be justified. 

Where is justice found? All peoples cry out for justice.  The whole earth cries out for justice.  Will justice be found?  “Father forgive them.  They know not what they do.”

PRAYERS ANSWERED
Our planning meeting went very well.  We were able to define our priorities and came up with some creative ways to deepen our unity and effectiveness.  It was a good day.  We are proud of our teammates and all the great relationships they have with islanders and all the people they love and care for. Our big boy turned 5 years old! We are thankful for all the ways he is growing and learning!


PRAYERS REQUESTED
On this holiday weekend, pray that we would have opportunities to share about what is important to us.  Pray for some of the gathering we have planned too.  Some of our teammates have been sick this week, pray for their health and the good health of our team.  Electricity has gotten REALLY bad this week.  Pray for better governance and less corruption and that we would have greater patience as we deal with even deeper power cuts.