Glimpses into Pain

Local Island Artwork

Baki is one of the landlords (as team leaders we pay the rent on all the team houses).  I don’t see him very often, mostly when it’s time to pay the rent, but he is a friendly guy.  He has a big smile, a friendly face and a deep resonant voice.  He lived in Tanzania for a time, so he speaks some English with an East African accent and he likes to try to use it when he’s with me, although we often switch into French or the local language.  He seems like a responsible man.  He has a good job and appears to take care of his family and not to be frivolous with his money.

This week Baki came by to get the rent.  We often take care of business and then sit and talk for awhile.  We were complaining about the problem of electricity (as you know if you’ve been following our blog electricity is a big problem these days).  When suddenly he changed the subject.  Maybe it was caused by the sight of our three kids running around the house but his face became downcast and he spoke more softly,

“My wife and I.  We have a problem.  We don’t have any babies.”

My first thought was to think, “Why is he sharing this with me? I don’t know him all that well.”  But here he was sharing with me some of his suffering.  I asked him how long they had been married.  Four years.  I asked if they had been to any doctors.

Peter & Grace

“Yes,” he said, “here and on [the neighboring island].  We’ve been to Island doctors too.”
(I suspect when he mentioned an Island doctor he was talking about a witch doctor.) “But they haven’t told us anything. It’s very hard.”

It is very hard.  For anyone in this situation, whether on the Islands or in the States.  It’s always hard.  But it’s also different for Islanders.  I’ve been here long enough to know that part of his troubles have to do with the decision he is weighing in his mind.

“People are telling me to take another wife.”  He finally said.
“Yes,” I said. “That’s what people do here.  For us it is not an option.  We stay with our wife.  Would your wife like you to take another wife?” I asked, maybe a bit prematurely.
“No.  She does not want this.  They never want this.”
I think he loves his wife.  That is why he is hurting over the decision.  He does not want to hurt her.  But his society, his religion, probably his own family is telling him to take a new woman.  How long will he be able to stand against that?  One day a beautiful face will turn his head, and suddenly that loyalty which his conscious is telling him to have to his wife will be drowned out by the temptations and traditions of life and culture.  What hope does he have?  How much longer will he wait?  What hope is there for his wife?

“When I have a big problem I pray,”  I told him.  I asked if I could pray for him and his wife.  He agreed.  I asked if I could pray right now.  He agreed.  I asked if I could pray in the name of the One I always pray to.  He refused.  I told him, the one I follow is able to heal.  He gave sight to the blind, made the deaf hear and gave babies to mothers, but he was not comfortable with me praying.  So I told him, I will not pray now, but I will pray.  He thanked me and shortly after that, left.

David w/ his favorite toy

Baki seems like a guy who has it all together.  Good job, good wife, handsome, respected. He gives all the appearance of not needing much help. Yet, inside he is hurting.  I wonder, how many others are hurting?  Why did he share his pain with me?  I don’t know why he shared with me.  Maybe he doesn’t know either.   But now I know it and I am praying.

PRAYERS ANSWERED
From our last blog... Sterehi came back and renewed the book, he wanted to read it more. Amy (our old teammate on Volcano Island) is coming for a visit to Clove Island- we are very excited to have her! Our team has finished their first 6 months!! We continue to be blessed by the mixture of experiences, talents and perspectives that our team brings to our work here. We are very thankful for each one of them. 


PRAYERS REQUESTED
Please pray with us for Baki and his wife. Pray that his wife might get pregnant and that even if she doesn’t he might go against tradition. Grace turns 6 this week- pray for a good time celebrating and for an end of lice and sickness (she stayed home sick most of this week). Pray for our kids-- they have been having fevers and tummy troubles this week. Pray for our pregnant teammate who has recently come down with a fever- pray for her and the baby. Pray for the continuing electricity crisis on the island. Pray for our teammates as they move into their official jobs on the island (not just studying the local language)- that they would make a smooth transition and continue to learn the local language.