Name Your Price

An old friend visits us while visiting Clove island

We’ve lived on the islands for four years now.  Most of the time we feel like we have a decent understanding of culture and language.  Of course, there is always more to learn, but we take comfort in the fact that we have enough sense and cultural understanding to avoid the pitfalls, the communicational blunders and accidental insults that happen regularly for newcomers.  But we are not immune to them.

Like all societies, Clove Island’s society is stratified.  Islanders do not carry such notions as our American egalitarian ideals.  Some families are rich in wealth and history and as such are greatly respected and greatly honored.  They are treated with deference and no one questions their right to be proud and even haughty.  The regular rules do not apply to them, and society accepts this and even promotes it.  As white westerners we have even experienced this deference directed at us.  I have never been able to take a common seat at a wedding, but am always moved to a place of honor--whether I want it or not.  Weddings are actually a time when the stratification is clearly seen. There is a sort of musical chairs when higher level guests are brought forward to places of honor, and at times even displace those already seated, sending them to a lower level of respect.  All of this happens rather seamlessly at weddings as everyone knows everyone else and everyone seems to intuitively know at what strata each should be placed.

Important people being seated at a wedding

Everyone knows this--almost intuitively.  I (Tom) do not.  In fact, most of the time I am completely clueless.  Numerous times someone has said to me, “Did you know you were talking to so-and-so?” and my answer is always surprise and interest--partially because I didn’t know, but partially because it doesn’t really matter to me.  I imagine it should, but this part of American culture is so ingrained in me that I don’t tend to be properly awed or impressed to know I was talking to the director of the port or a man from a prominent and respected family.  Sometimes, this attitude gets me into trouble:

Two women came to our door on Thursday right in the middle of our team meeting.  We were busy meeting and they were women so I passingly greeted them and called for Megan to receive them outside.  (We normally invite people in, but for meeting days, we bring chairs on the porch and meet there.)  A bit later Megan came in and said, “I think you need to go out there.”  The woman was from an important family and she wanted to speak to me.

I went out apologetically explaining that we were having a meeting and that was the reason for meeting on the porch.  The woman, with a look of begrudging acceptance, then explained to me the reason for her visit.

David's burn is healing well

“I have a son.  I want you to tutor him in English.  He will come everyday.  I will pay whatever you want.  Name your price!”

Taken a little aback, I explained that price is not my concern.  We are volunteers and so I don’t work for a salary.  Then I explained that we don’t tutor individuals, we only teach classes. Then I gave some class options for her son.  She looked less than pleased.

“I’m from the former president’s family,” she said rather quietly as if it was embarrassing that I wasn’t aware and that she should have to tell me.
“Oh,” I replied.  “Can your son come and visit me?  Maybe he could come to our English Club if his level of English is sufficient.”  I knew it wasn’t what she wanted to hear, but I was not about to start tutoring her son everyday.  With a look of dismissiveness, she agreed to send him over.  With nothing else to say she rose to leave.  As I walked her to the door she tried one last time.

“Do you know Salim?”  She asked, as if this surely would carry some weight.

“I know many Salims.” I replied.  Wrong answer.  Clearly she was not talking about any old Salim, but Salim.  She turned and walked out looking rather exasperated.  I went back inside to the meeting, thoughts running through my head...Perhaps that could have been handled better...I wonder who Salim is...Name your price?...Did I just insult the family of the head of state?... How much would she have paid?…

Her son never came to visit.  He probably had more important things to do.

PRAYERS ANSWERED
The ladies on our team have signed a contract on a new home! David burn continues to heal well. A translation project for Clove Island is getting started-- it is very exciting to see it coming together! Grace and Peter have met their teachers and bought all their school supplies to start school this coming week! We figured out that we had a faulty modem, so if we can replace the modem we should have much better and more reliable internet. Our new English classes started well!


PRAYERS REQUESTED
The shortages on the island continue. There is still no flour and now we hear that rice and cooking oil are getting in short supply. Pray that the expected container ship would come soon with these basic supplies. We are starting a new unit of study on Cross Cultural communication-- pray that our team would gain great insights into how to communicate essential things well into this cultural context. Pray for us as we try to balance English teaching, homeschooling, taking care of our team and reaching out to islanders.